Counting Time that's Past

"Just because you've been dating for a couple months doesn't mean you're in love and are going to get married" -anonomous

Its an interesting thought in all reality. How to go about dating, courting or whatever, is different for all people, some being friends first, becoming friends through dating or something in between. This friend of mine has been dating her man for more then several years now and I have much respect for her. When I look at them, (just to make clear I am not a creeper and do not see them all that often) I find myself admiring the fact that after dating for so long the still have maintained good boundaries and still have a firm grasp on what it means to be friends, best friends.

I think often times people lose sight of that, what in means to be friends with the people they are in relationship's with. They get so caught up in the mushy gushy that they forget to do "friend" things. I am not really talking about anything specific but its just interesting to think about. Maybe its in the fact that people become so infatuated with the idea that now that they are in a relationship both can become more intimate physically. Yes this is something that comes along with dating but I do not think it should be the primary concern. I think the goal of dating is to learn more about the PERSON. Who they are, what they don't and don't like and my favourite; learning to read them, becoming so familiar that can recognize non verbal cues and know if and what is one their mind.

If the focus was rather to learn more about that person, to encourage them and stand behind them I think the relationship would grow in a much deeper and unique way. It is also a really good way to find out if you are actually compatable with this person. I was talking to another friend and she got it right when she said "I don't think love is enough. You have to be compatable with the person." If you fail to have similar goals and dreams and hobbies then that relationship is built upon nothing more then mushy goo and when fights and trias come they won't have anything to stand on. But if you are heading in the same direction then you can spur each other on, and encourage and correct when you notice one falling away from the path that will lead to the goal.

I have come to observe several couples who have managed to understand what this means and it encourages me that I can find the same. I am glad to have people such as these who I can look to examples as well as look to Christ to give ultimate wisdom on such subjects.

I am grateful.